A Day Off

Winter finally came! We have about five inches of the fluffy white stuff and maybe two or three more on the way tonight. Why not take the advantage of it and go sledding with the kids? What if this is God's way of saying, "Take the day off and enjoy yourself". Personally, I love this kind of weather. I never really could understand why so many people complain about it. HELLO, you do live in the upper midwest. What if this is what Heaven looks like? If fire and arid conditions represent the other place, then Heaven could possibly be a peaceful snowy wonderland. But, knowing God, there are probably more than just four seasons in Heaven.

All Fathers Are Generals

One of my great honors in my life was serving in the United States Air Force for ten years. I was part of the 377th Civil Engineering Squadron at Kirtland Air Force Base which is located in Albuquerque, New Mexico. Our job was primarily base support....construction, plumbing, electricity, heating and air conditioning and so on. My job was liquid fuels maintenance which means that I was a glorified gas station attendant. There wasn't much of a demand for my skill set at Kirtland so I volunteered to work in our war readiness unit. Some of my responsibilities there were: accounting for all deployable equipment, instructing fifty man teams on methods of deployment and issuing small arms. I loved this part of the job.
So, what's all of this got to do with being a father and a General? At the time, I was not a father. I was just a kid in the military. On December 1st of 1990, my world changed. I was deployed to serve in "Desert Shield", the first Persian Gulf War. I did not know what expect and at the time, I was not a follower of Christ. We were going into unknown territory to face unknown circumstances and we had to place our trust in our Commander. Once we arrived, our task was to build one of the largest "tent cities" the war would see. It took us a few weeks to accomplish this task but the experience was amazing. This tent city became our new home and base. Every day life was similar to that at Kirtland and it was back to business as usual: heating, plumbing electric and so on. During my off time, I started reading the Bible, and it was then that I discovered who Jesus was. Up until that day, I was afraid of dying. Jesus became so consuming to me that I completely lost any fear of becoming a casualty.
Operation Desert Storm started on January 16th, 1991. Our General had prepared a speech to remind us why we were all there. In today's military, the Generals and Colonels do most of the work behind the scenes. The Captains receive their orders from them and lead us based on their knowledge. The soldiers (or in Air Force terms, the airmen), have to trust the and follow the Generals orders based on his experience and knowledge of war. I think that has a lot in common with being a father. Our kids are soldiers on the battle front every day. The enemy (satan) will throw anything he can at kids to lead them away from Christ. He will put things in front of them such as low self worth, drugs and even sex to get their attention. As fathers, our duty is to defend our kids and prepare them for battle. We are Generals and our orders come from God. We have to educate, affirm and love our kids unconditionally, and we have to do this in Christ. We ultimately know who wins the war but God calls on us to serve. He calls us to stand up for what we believe in. He calls on us to love each other. And He calls on us and empowers us to rebuke the enemy. Will you be a General for your children?

Be a Man!

What defines manliness.....clothes, income, cars? Or maybe it's how good of an athlete or how strong we are. The women we date, the cologne we wear, the music we listen to......the list goes on and on. As soon as I turn on a TV or step outside of my house, society tells me it's all of the above. I struggle with a lot of these. When I was in High School, I knew a guy who was six foot five and he had a full mustache. My friends and I used to joke with him about how much of a stud or a man he was, and he was only 15.
Yesterday, I received the great news that I was going to be an uncle. My brother is going to have a kid. To me, this is one of the biggest steps into manhood if taken seriously. There is a lot of responsibility in being a father. It becomes not just being about us but being what that child needs. I made the choice to sacrifice a lot when I became a father. I think one of the biggest changes I made was the willingness to find out who God was and to pursue Him whole heartedly. After all, He is THE MAN!
As I grow closer to God, I find out what my worth is as a man. I still like cool cars and tend to over exercise myself, but I try to place my focus on God before those things. I think He wants us to have nice things and experience the cool stuff in life as long as we worship Him first. I'm not perfect by any definition (there was only One who was on this Earth), but I strive for righteousness. To me, that defines...BE A MAN!

My son Dominick...future MAN.

Religion Sucks!

Growing up, I had no religion at all. Well, at least not with GOD. I didn't know who Jesus Christ was except for for colorful pictures drawn in the family bible. I didn't go to church. I pretty much lived my life as a kid with no spiritual meaning at all. As I look back, I remember we had a lot of traditions during religious holidays,but they did not glorify God. In fact, they kept me occupied and away from God. Don't get me wrong. There is nothing wrong with tradtion, but if it is separating us from our maker, then it cannot be good. The way I see it, religion was tradition.
I'm much older now and I have found God and walk with Him every day. I have tremendous friends in my life who are believers as well. I go to church on a regular basis, read the bible and other spiritual books and practice decipleship outside of the church during the week. One of my close friends, who is also the pastor of our church, was teaching on religion one weekend and pointed something out to me that I will never forget. He said that Jesus spent his entire life trying to get us away from religion. That is pretty powerful stuff to me. Why is it, that a lot of the religions out there have rules that only a high priest can talk to God for us? Why can't we have a personal relationship with Jesus? Why is it so many of us feel like we are separate from God? I think religion does that to us.
Last weekend, a woman came forward in our church and gave her testimony. I could not have been any less prepared for what I was about to hear. She grew up as a Jehova's witness and the life she lived was everything short of a crucifiction. I will not go into details as to what she testified, but some of the things I heard included sexual assault, physical abuse, mental abuse, loneliness, rebuked, homeless and the list goes on and on. She talked for about thirty minutes, but it seemed like an eternity to have to sit there and listen to this. I wanted to get up and walk out but I couldn't. I was anxious to hear if this story had a happy ending. I experienced every feeling or emotion that a human can have, but the most was anger. Anger for people committing hideous acts and hiding behind their religion. I personally wanted to ask this lady who and where these people are so that I could avenge her. I sat there and sorted out my feelings and processed everything to my best ability. All I could come up with was that, RELIGION SUCKS! As her story approached it's end she shared with us the power of forgiveness. I would like to say that this was the happy ending, but her story is not over yet. She still has a great amount of work to do. Recovery from any abuse is a life long event. We all stood and applauded her courage and one by one, we walked up to her and thanked her for her testimony.
My attentions here are not to offend anybody. But a wise friend once told me, "If somebody says or does something that offends you, then let it stick for a while. There must be some truth as to why it offends you." My hope is, that anyone who is stuck in a religious or traditional life style that is preventing them from truly knowing God, can break free and find their salvation in Him.

Hunk of Metal

When I was a kid, I was fascinated by cars. I loved everything about them. The way they looked, the smells of the interior, getting my hands dirty when working on them, I mean everything. I had a fairly large HotWheel collection that my friend and I would just sit and play with for hours. I drew renderings of cars. On of my favorite memories is how my dad and I would put together models of his favorite cars, what a bonding moment. And I wasn't just particular to one make of car, I loved them all. Ford, Chevy, and Oldsmobile were a few of my favorites.

As I got older, my anticipation to own and drive a vehicle could not be explained. I liked cars more than girls when I was a teenager. Getting my licsence was serious business for me. I passed with flying colors. The next order of business was getting a car. Fortunately, that was taken care of by my dad and grandma. Grandma bought a new, economical 1986 Honda and decided to give her 1976 Olds Cutlass to me as a surprise gift. I couldn't believe it. I actually slept in it for a couple of nights until by back started hurting. It wasn't the car I dreamed of having. Most of my friends had sports cars and muscle cars and this one was more along the lines of 70's luxury. But it served me well and it was free. It only took me two months to wreck it and then I went without for a while.

Years would go by and cars would come and go. I have owned sixteen cars since then. Currently I own just two. I have my daily driver, a 2001 Chevy Suburban, which serves as my work truck and my family transporter, and I have a 1999 Ford Mustang Saleen Replica.

Yesterday, my Suburban broke down. Being -4 degrees outside didn't help matters much. I have been having a lot of little problems with it lately, but this one really set me off. To me, it became a hunk of metal. Lots of people have used the term "Hunk of Metal" to label cars to me. But I disagree. To me it is more than just a car. It is someone's creation. It is their passion! Henry Ford revolutionalized the automobile for us. He had an idea and a passion for something that went beyond his conception. This passion defined who he was. Who would Henry Ford have been without this creation?

Sure, nothing lasts forever, and someday every car will be a hunk of metal.

But who is to say that we can't take what was old and make it new again?

One of my dreams is to purchase an old Mustang and restore it with on of my kids. It would be more than just bringing an old car back to life. It would be a time of learning, growing and bonding together with my kid. It would be a memory that would last forever and maybe even into eternity. So, to me, cars aren't just hunks of metal or just merely means of transportation. They are passions, ideas and American dreams. My love for cars goes beyond what they are designed for. They are art and a way for an individual to express themself. To me, they have a soul. A soul that could be renewed again after years of waiting in an auto graveyard.

Adventure Trip

One of my favorite memories of my childhood is when my best friend and I would lay in the grass and just stare up at a star filled sky and imagine. Where does it end? How many stars are there? How big are the stars? Is there really a God? At the time, I probably didn't think much of it, but I was having an intimate conversation with God. He was staring right back at me and I didn't even realize it. I don't lay in the grass that much any more, but I still wonder.
I have matured a lot since those days, physically and spiritually. Recently, I was reading a book called "Wild Goose Chase" by Mark Batterson. One of his questions was, Do angels yawn? How can an angel possibly be bored in Heaven? What if there are such things as guardian angels? If we are living such boring lives, wouldn't our guardian angels be bored as well? I don't feel like my life is an adventure any more. We all get stuck in patterns of lifestyle, but that doesn't mean it can't be adventurous. What if God was telling me, that starlit night when I was a kid, that He has big plans for my life. That is was going to be an adventure. As I look back, I think of all of the cool stuff I have done in my life. I served in the Persian Gulf, got married, had kids, and found Jesus. Those are all large adventures with lots of small ones built in. Some people might say, "Those aren't adventures, that's just a part of life". I guess it just depends on how you look at it. But what if the bigger adventures in life comes from the acknowledgement of what we already know? What if He doesn't allow us to the next level of adventure if we aren't even thankful for the ones that have already been presented? What if we're just too lazy or scared to go on adventure?
Challenge: what would you do that is outside of your comfort zone? I triple-dog dare you to go on adventure this year. I know I am, and it starts with laying in the grass (snow) and staring up at the sky.

Raising Kids

I think one of the toughest challenges I face every day is raising three kids. Three very different kids at three different ages. Anthony, who is four, is still at a fun age for me. He is like me when it comes to mechanics or just laughing at stupid stuff. We can sit and play Legos, read a book or just roll around on the floor and that keeps keeps him content. He is my buddy.
Eleana, who is now seven, is quite the artist. She loves to draw, color and create things. She reminds me a lot of myself when I was seven. I could sit and draw for hours when I was a kid. Not only is she talented, she is beautiful as well. She scares me. How am I going to handle her when she changes into a woman? I don't even like to think about it.
Then there's Dominick. Dominick is our first born. He is now ten. He taught himself how to read at the age of four. The kid is a prodigy. He is ahead of most of his classmates by a couple of years. His intelligence is a blessing but it is also the thing I struggle with the most. He sometimes thinks he can outwit me and he pushes his limits a lot. I have a very hard time dealing with him. I feel like I have nothing in common with him and I hate that.
Three very different kids at three very different places in life. How am I supposed to balance all of this? How do I keep everything in check? Am I a good father to them? These are the questions I ask myself everyday. I think one important piece of information I forgot to include is that I am a stay-at-home dad. I am the glue that is supposed to keep the family together. I know that I'm not perfect, in fact I make a lot of mistakes when it comes to raising them. I do things, that my parents did, I said I would never do. I often see myself as a failure. That's where my wife comes in. She is constantly affirming me and showing me where I might be able to make some changes. She is truly my better half. Without her, our kids would be doomed. They would be stuck with an angry, pathetic dad who doesn't seem to care. I think one of the biggest things I choose to do is that I go to my kids and ask for forgiveness when I am out of line. My parents never did that for me and I wish they had. I love that God gave me the opportunity to be a dad. I hope, that in the end, God says I was a good father.

Blogging is stupid!

I never could understand why people would want to "blog" about themselves. To me it was just another self centered act of getting attention. Then my wife started a blog, and I got hooked on reading hers. I realized it is exactly like keeping a journal, but this journal has total access. I discovered that there is something theraputic to expressing your feelings in words and what a great tool it is for someone else to understand something about that person they may not have picked up on earlier. I started following a couple of other friends blogs as well and saw some other benefits of venting or just being able to share something totally off the wall with someone. So here I am, starting a blog. Most of mine will be random thoughts, some personal, some inspiring and some will just be totally STUPID. Hope you enjoy and I am looking forward to some input.