Donuts With Dad

My son Dominick and I had donuts together at his school this morning.

It was "Donuts With Dads" day and I felt that this would be an important bonding moment for the two of us. We arrived right at seven (in the a.m.) and when we got there, the cafeteria was packed. Nothing but dads and students. Every table was filled and there was a line about a mile long to receive our single donut and a cup of juice. We made it through the line and found an open seat, so we grabbed it. I greeted one of the dads as I sat down and then began to try to connect with my boy.

As I was sitting there, I noticed a lot of kids grouping up and a lot of dads just sitting there, staring at their kids without a word to say. I even heard a couple of dads making fun of their kids at an attempt to make themselves look "manly" in front of their own piers. I began to talk to Dominick even more, but there was a huge sadness growing in my heart. I realized that a lot of those kids were actually me and my dad. I realized that my dad probably didn't intend to belittle me as much as he did, but it's hard not to when you're in the company of other confused and lost men. I try very hard to affirm my kids and build them up, but just like my dad did so many years ago, I get caught up in the moment and I chop them down. I usually catch myself doing this and I have to ask for forgiveness immediately. I love my kids and I love my dad, but one of my goals in life is to be the best father that I can be. My dad was a good dad, but no one is perfect, not even me. So, we sat, and talked, and ate our donut, and I loved every minute of it.

Of course, I did notice that Dominick seemed uncomfortable and quiet. That's when I remembered how awkward it feels hanging out with your dad can feel sometimes. Especially if it was with my dad . . . that guy was also a total goofball back then. I think Dominick might have been nervous that I was going to embarrass him or something. I guess I would have felt that way too. Maybe I am just like my dad . . . a total goofball. Oh well, us men turn into our fathers sooner or later. Dominick has so much to look forward to. My hope and prayer for him is that he can do a better job than me at being a dad someday.