Friends & Family

I grew up in Columbus Ohio. I guess you could say we were your average blue collar family. Dad worked all day to provide for us and mom stayed home to raise us. I only have one brother and no sisters. My brother and I are only a year a part, so we played good together, for the most part. We lived in a neighborhood filled with kids so we had a lot of friends as well.
As my brother and I grew older, we took on different interests and our personalities changed too. He became more adventurous and I became more shy. I developed a small circle of friends and he became popular and had a large group of friends.
I do remember one evening at the dinner table, sitting and thinking how things were changing. My brother and I were both in a hurry to finish our dinner so we could bolt out the door to go play. I recall thinking how we weren't really functioning as the family we used to be. We were gone all day with our friends, came in to eat, and then gone again. Where as before, when we were younger, we would play together, eat all of our meals together, have conversation together, and then do something together as a family to end the evening.
Maybe there is nothing wrong with this picture. Maybe this how most families were and are. But, I have always believed, that a family that plays together, stays together. I also think it is important to have friends. A community of people that share common interests. Real friends, that build you up instead of tearing you down.
So now I have a family of my own. My wife, Ann and I, have a ten year old son (Dominick), a seven year old daughter (Eleana) who will be eight next month, and a five year son (Anthony). I never thought that I would have three kids, let alone one. But here we are. Oh, and we have a two year dog named Coco. She is a chocolate lab and she is very much a part of our family.
We are close family. Somewhat similar to the one that I grew up in. Ann works and I stay home with the kids. I have a side business that I run from home so I am always available if I am needed. I notice how the kids play together. Anthony and Lanie get along great and do a lot of stuff together. Since Lanie is the middle child, she also gets along well with Dominick. Anthony and Dominick very rarely interact together, but when they do, it brings me great joy.
Now that it is summer, the kids pretty much just hang around the house and watch t.v. or play video games. This drives me insane. We have a nanny, and she is GREAT, but I think it is hard for her to find something that they all can enjoy doing at the same time. She takes them to the pool and has activities for them, but it can be a daunting task sometimes to entertain three kids. Believe me, I know!!
The one that my heart breaks for the most is Dominick. When I was ten, I had my brother that I could still play with, but I had a lot of new friends as well. Well, maybe not a lot, but at least two or three. Dominick has a few good buddies, but very rarely spends any time with them. I am always telling him to call and invite, but he won't reach out. I asked Dominick to try to contact some of the kids in this neighborhood, but he says that he doesn't like them. Or that they don't like him because he is too different. Dominick is different, but he is also unique. He is incredibly smart for his age. He taught himself how to read when he was four. He is not very adventurous or a chance taker for that matter, but he will engage in something if it looks fun to him. The kids that do open up to him look up to him because he is a leader. That can also be a downfall. Sometimes he leads too much. He is very competitive and hates losing. But, he is still my son and I love him. I want the best for him. And, as a father, I will do anything to provide for my family.

So, here we are today. Our house is on the market and we are hoping to downsize and to find a neighborhood that has more kids in it. We are praying for a neighborhood that has more community in it. I want my kids to value friendship more than the security of a big fancy house. As a father and a husband, I want to provide what is really important for my family. But, I also need to remember to be a family member as well. To play with my kids as much as I can. To sit and read with them or just hang out and talk. Because there will come a day, when my wish will come true. They will be sitting at that dinner table, eating as fast as they can, so they can bolt out the door. They will have their best buds and Ann and I will be boring to them. And then I will be wishing that I had spent more time with them. I'll always be wondering what they are doing. I will miss them. I will also be happy for them. They are great kids and I love them and God gave them to me to love for a season.